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Monday, July 13, 2009

SEVENTEEN IS THE BOMB

happy birthday Pictures, Images and Photos


HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME




I hope this day will be a blast.
I should be happy all the way.
Another year for me, thank you Lord.

Again, I SHOULD BE HAPPY.
>:D<






Thursday, July 9, 2009

And if there's something wrong who would have guessed it?

I admit it, I am trying to be happy. For all this time, I thought I am happy but I guess I am not. I am fine but not happy. I am not sad neither happy. So what should I name this weird feeling? All I know is that I am not contented and I don't know what is really missing.

I felt giddy about my birthday earlier today maybe due to me making my wish list yesterday. I just feel thrilled, eh? But I felt that in just a short time. I realized there is nothing to be excited about. As if all the people around me are not aware of my birthday. Okay call me a drama queen now. I know that I should not be feeling this way but I just can't help it. It's like they are all acting as if I'm not here. They keep on ignoring me. What's this? Is this for real or am I just being paranoid?

One thing that really makes me sad is my giant birthday card. :(((
I guess I will not receive a card this year. I am super unhappy and it makes me wanna cry. Because to me, that card is the greatest gift above all. By just seeing my friends' name with their messages will really make my day. And I really believe that I won't be getting any. IT SUCKS. :((

And because I want it badly, I plan to buy a card for myself and ask one friend to take charge and let my other friends sign it, then give it to me on Monday as if I really don't know anything about it. BUT, I can't find any giant birthday card on the mall. That's why I am really, really sad now. I am super desperate in having that card. Stupid. :((

The number one reason of my sadness are my friends. I just feel that they don't care. You know that, it's been days of me being not the usual me and still they can't feel it. They keep on teasing me, and telling me stuffs that really hurts me. I am asking them for favors and still they refuse. I keep on texting them and lucky as I am, I got no replies. And desperate as I am, I am super dropping hints about that birthday card and still they act as if they did not hear anything. GOSH. I am feeling so alone. I am super depressed. I know this is not right, help.

Sorry for being too melodramatic on my past blogs, this is my only way to release my feelings, eh? I have no one to talk to about serious matters, only this. I have no best friend, I have nothing. Only writing accompanies me in everything, and that's one big reason for me to smile. Gaahhh, I want this feeling to stop. I want to be happy. I need reasons to be happy. PLEASE, MAKE ME HAPPY. :|


Wednesday, July 8, 2009

So much for birthday wishes, I've been too busy with bad memories


Oh, yes I know. The title is overly dramatic. I can't think of any title, eh? And it was one of my favorite songs. :) Whatever, just deal with that.


In just five days, I'll be blowing another candle and that will make me blown seventeen candles in total. I don't know what to feel, because it's kind of mixed emotions. I feel happy and excited, at the same time sad and worried.

One thing I love about birthdays is the feeling of being important. I'm not talking about the attention here, I just love being loved. You know, the feeling when all of the people around me are acting as if I am the most important person in the world, and I so love to experience that, even if just in a day.

Another is the birthday messages, may it be text, friendster comment, e-mails, IMs, or whatever message. I really, really appreciate it.

Another was the presents given to me. It's not about the material things actually, it is about the thoughtfulness of the person who gave it to me. I am
super mababaw, just give me something and I will treasure that. I am a sentimental person, eh?

To those who can't relate, my birthday is on the 13th, that's on Monday and I'll be 17 then. That's why I am enjoying the last few days of me being a sweet sixteen. I am not getting any younger now, and as much as I don't want to be a woman yet, I have to act like one. Ugh, and that makes me worried again. HAHA.

Okay, we all know that every birthday girl has her own wishes, may it be material or not. So I've decided to make my wish list this year. I don't know if my friends will be able to read this because, honestly they are not interested on this, on what I love doing. :( And though, they'll not read this, I just want to post my wishes and see if I'll be getting any on Monday.


MY WISH LIST

  • giant birthday card (one should give me this and let the others write on the card)
  • scratch paper/ notes with a personal message for me
  • DIY notes and cards too!
  • BIG HUGS and KISSES
  • sweet nothings
  • July issue of FHM
  • July issue of Candy
  • Any other back issues of Candy
  • Silent Sanctuary's album, Mistaken for Granted
  • Any Spongebob, Snoopy, Death Note esp. L stuffs
  • A BOOK! Any interesting book.
  • LOAD. HAHAHAHA.
  • chocolates?
  • ingredients on Restaurant City in Facebook
  • gifts for Posh on Pet Society in Facebook
  • company for the event on July 17
  • anything surprising, shocking, exciting and interesting
  • sweet gestures
  • happiness
  • WHAT ELSE? Ugh, anything. Anything from the ♥.
That's it. That simple. I wish I'll be able to get and experience those. Well, I'm not after the material things, I'm more excited to receive messages and the hugs and kisses. Oh, well. Hope they'll be aware of this. HAHA. I'll be posting this blog link on facebook, friendster, multiply, plurk and twitter. We'll see how curious they can be. AH, I guess I'll be still cross-fingered on the next five days.

YAY! HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME.
:)

CREDITS:
picture from jadedjennifer